Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
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