There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize