Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Randomize
