i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
my poor anus
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
