The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
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