yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.