so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
