bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
