chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
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