If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
10+ Incredible Tumblr Stories That Will Leave You Shook
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
16 People Who Have Raised The Bar For Petty Revenge
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.