do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize
