Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(623): View more from Arizona

just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"

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(218): View more from Minnesota

Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse

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25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
Read it at the TFLN blog
(505): View more from New Mexico

I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too

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(906): View more from Michigan

Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.

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(618): View more from Illinois

I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.

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(561): View more from Florida

I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw

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