your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize