brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Randomize
