Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
