Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Randomize