Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
