All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
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