u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize