Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
