And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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