I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
