Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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