chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
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