she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
