question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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