I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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