it's too hot outside to masturbate.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
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