I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize