The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
