so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
