This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
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