i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
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