The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I FOUND THE LEGS
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
