haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
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