last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize