Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Randomize
