People with herpes should wear stickers.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
