a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize