You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Randomize
