Taylor Swift is so right about you.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
