Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry JScales1017ix hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(202): View more from Washington, DC

either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying

Fav 2 842 1258
share tweet
(304): View more from West Virginia

You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon

Fav 5 5215 1638
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(631): View more from New York

Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk

Fav 18 1318 4969
share tweet
(831): View more from California

maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick

Fav 3 940 1698
share tweet
(312): View more from Illinois

Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.

Fav 4 2176 837
share tweet
(313): View more from Michigan

Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.

Fav 8 902 1836
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(509): View more from Washington

He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.

(425): View more from Washington

Is that even possible?

(509): View more from Washington

I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.

Fav 17 1184 3104
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(419): View more from Ohio

You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.

Fav 0 288 170
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(470): View more from Georgia

I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man

Fav 0 42 17
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT