great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Randomize
