haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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