two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
