yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
there was a trapeze. enough said
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
