I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
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