Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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