One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Randomize