I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
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