I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
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I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
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Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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